I would like you to revisit the topic for your midterm essay and think about how can you make your persuasive essay better? Check out the handouts on persuasive essay and the questions on your midterm essay. The topic is Do you think Egyptian art and ancient artifacts should be placed in museums or is it ok to auction them off for personal use? Why? Post your second draft as a reply to this blog.
Since you already worked on this assignment before, this version will be the second draft. Post the second draft of your essay by March 19th on the blog (before class starts) AND share your essay with your peer group to get feedback. Please use Google Docs for feedback.
Peer Feedback- March 21st
Your peers should give you feedback by Thursday, March 21st. Share the document with me so that I can review your peer feedback and give you feedback too. Click on the insert comment tool that looks like the icon in the middle of this image. Please use the icon INSERT COMMENT from the MIDDLE OF THE TOP BANNER. If you use this function, your name will appear along with the feedback. If you use color code, mention that you are using BLUE and you are (YOUR NAME).
Final essay- March 25th
You will post the third draft (Final) on the blog on March 25th.
Here is the rubric I will use for your persuasive essay:
Academic Preparation 3
Persuasive Essay Rubric
Criteria | Possible Points | Points Earned | Comments |
Essay Structure · clear thesis · effective hook/background information · clear topic sentences · effective conclusion (restates thesis and summarizes) | 15 | ||
Organization · effective use of transitions · ideas are organized · ideas are clear | 10 | ||
Strength of Content/Persuasion · clear, strong ideas · specific examples to support · facts (research) that is relevant · sufficient/relevant support | 25 | ||
Language · Grammar and vocabulary appropriate for Level 3 · Research is properly cited (footnotes) · Variety of sentence structure present | 10 | ||
Feedback (Did you successfully apply peer/teacher feedback?) | 7 | ||
Format Spelling Capitalization Punctuation | 8 | ||
Grade: /75 Essay Overall is: High Level At Level Low Level | |||
When we talk about ancient artifacts, we always think of the museums, because most of artifacts are kept in there, and some of artifacts belong to individual people, in my opinion, I think that is not a good sign for society, we can use ancient artifacts to do something that helpful for society and person. So, I think we can sell the artifacts for personal use, because sell ancient artifacts could earn money, people have chance to know the artifacts in detail, and it can make the economic developing.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, one reason artifacts could be sold is because it could earn more money to the government. As we know, the museum belong to the government, recently, many places was polluted by development, so, the government should spend much money to protect environment and help some people who were homeless. It is a huge number, so I think sell artifacts could earn more money to burden the expenses for government. Charity Auction is good way to help people and show the love for the citizen.
In addition, selling artifacts could make more people have chance to know the artifacts in detail, most of time, we watch the artifacts in museum, we just can see the artifacts, but we couldn’t touch it, glass separate the distance with artifacts, we haven’t had chance to know more about artifacts. If artifacts could be sold, the person will have more chance to touch the artifacts and the artifacts will become part of life, I believe that is a good thing for society, make more people know the art and make artifacts more famous. It good for improve people’s knowledge.
Finally, selling artifacts can make the economic developing, now, the economic is developing quickly, but the agriculture, industry and technology are stable, if the artifacts could enter in this market, may be it will have good effect for economic. It not only could show the precious of artifacts to people, but also could improve the development. Let’s our ancestor things perform in the world of economic. I believe that will have big influence.
By analyzing the advantages of selling artifacts, we can find many good effects for society and person. It could earn money, people have chance to know the artifacts in detail, and it can make the economic developing. However, it doesn’t mean we need sell all artifacts, show them in museum is also good things for personal education, we need use right way to assign the artifacts, that will make the artifacts more useful and make more people know it!
Egyptian art and ancient artifacts should be placed in museums or is it good to auction them off for personal use? It is a big issue in the world. We have a lot of art in museums. We’re also to auction art off for personal use. So it’s both good or just one way is the good way? I think some people like art and want to own the art which they like. When they lost their money, do they still save the art? Museums aren’t easy to close. It’s important for their country. So I think museums are the best way to save Egyptian art and ancient artifacts.
ReplyDeleteWhy do people like Egyptian art and artifacts? It’s like money for some people. But the most important way is culture. We always study old culture to make the new culture. It’s good for humans. Egyptian art and ancient artifacts isn’t a lot in the world, but we still study a lot for them. If Egyptian art ancient artifact is placed in museums, we will easy to get the information and study. But there is someone own them. It’s not that helpful, so ancient artifacts and Egyptian in museums is good for human.
Some people thought that a lot of people visited museums every day. They may break Egyptian art and ancient artifacts. It was true. Some rich people they like Egyptian art and ancient artifacts. They bought them and save them. But I thought that if their family lost money, they may to auction them off for businessman, which they just want to earn more money for Egyptian art and ancient artifacts. For example, I heard a businessman who had an art which was just two in the world. So he bought another one and break it, then he was to auction them off for the own art and earn a lot of money. So I think Egyptian art and ancients in museums are better to auction.
Egyptian art and ancient artifacts still have a lot of information which we don’t know. We keeping it in museums may break it for a long time, but in this time we can get a lot of information and their not easy be stone. But someone they own the art. In this way, the Egyptian art and ancient artifacts will lose valuable. Art is helpful, so we love art. Egyptian art and ancient artifacts in museums are good for us to study history and get some information.
All in all, I think Egyptian art and ancient artifacts should be placed in museums. It’s the best way to save the art and culture. Now we have a lot of business they don’t care about the history or valuables. They just want to earn a lot of money in their life. It’s not good for the human. So we should save Egyptian art and ancient artifacts. In museums, this way we make the art more valuable.
Art plays an important part in our lives. More and more people try to learn about art. That's the reason why I think the work of art, especially Egyptian and ancient artifacts, should be placed in the museums. Every work of art is very valuable. It should be kept in the best environment. By this way, people can approach easier, and this's also the best way to teach the children about history.
ReplyDeleteActually, restoring ancient artifacts is not easy. Due to the different genres should be kept in different environmental conditions. Place, temporary, and the cleaning way are different too. In the museum , we have many professional staff who has experience and knowledge in art. Besides, most of Egyptian art and ancient artifacts were created many thousands years ago. Most of them have been worn out. It's easy to be destroyed if they are not preserved in good condition.
Moreover, the value of art is the good thing which brings to human. If art has just been kept for personal use, how can it be valuable for people? Placing art in museums is the best way to let everyone have chance to approach the art. Art is for not only rich people but also everyone. Placing art in museums brings art to get closer with the public.
In additional, learning history via work of art is easier than studying in book. In these days, there are many parents who love to take their children to museum every weekend. And there are many teachers, who teach history, try to help students to find the best way in studying history by taking them to museum. Because they think that people can learn faster and better if they can see some evidences of what they were taught in school.
Finally, there are many proofs show that placing art in museum is better than keeping for personal use. Everyone can get in touch with art. Actually, it's a best way for us to avoid to destroy the work of art. Moreover, value of ancient artifacts is human's property. It gives us many evidences about history. So that studying history in school become easier for students.
Egyptian art and ancient artifacts should be placed in museums. And we should not sell it for anyone. As we know ancient art is most important things. We should save and keep it in good situations. Because it happened in the past and our ancestors made it long time ago. We must keep it in museum and avoid sell it by auction.
ReplyDeleteThe best place for all arts and especially ancient arts will be the museum, because the museum is the best place to save arts undamaged. And we won’t worry about breaking or damaging. Also the people can see it free and any day. This is the best advantage we don’t have to pay money to see ancient arts.
Auction is bad idea for ancient arts, because it’s priceless and is not a private art. All people should see ancestors’ art. It is better if the government keep it in museum instead keep it at someone home. And maybe the person who gets the art can’t keep it safety likely he will damage it. The museum is the best place and the only place should keep the country’s arts.
The museum the only place we can trust for arts to keep it in a best situation. People can see it anytime without worrying. Also if you are interested in arts you can visit the museum daily. The government made the museum just for keep arts and drive people see arts.
The museum gives you anything you want to know about any art. And they give tourists more details about arts. Also you can ask who works in museum to help you if you have a question, they will give you information for any art. Absolutely people love earning a lot of information from something interesting them.
Adela Cedeno
ReplyDeleteI think that art is an expression of man and as such must be shared with as many people as possible. Man makes art for your enjoyment and the enjoyment of other. Therefore, Egyptian art should be in museum because in the museum more people are able to see it. Also, the best place to keep art, all kind of art is in a museum. Keeping Egyptian art in museums has many benefits for conservation and also for dissemination through educational activities. These benefits are:
First, in the museum all people can see Egyptian art, all people can enjoy art. Also, the museum has activities for the purpose of disseminate, with simple language, research about art. So everyone can understand and enjoy the art. When art is part of any private collection only few people can enjoy it and few people can learn about the art research. I believe, this is a main reason Egyptian art shouldn’t be sold to private collection.
Second, the experts can realize any investigation about the Egyptian art in a museum. One of the most important functions of the museum is to conduct research and then disseminate it. When the experts in art want to realize any research about any piece of art, they can do it in a museum but if the piece of art is part of private collection experts cannot do it, they need the owner's permission to do any research, it's not easy to get this permission and sometimes they do not get it.
Third, the Egyptian art receives the best care in a museum because in this place there are experts in art and they know how art should be taken care of and they dedicate all their time to do it. Artworks require specific care for them to remain always same and not altered or damaged. Egyptian art should be protected from moisture, light, heat and earthquakes, among others, as all of these elements can affect art and then damage it and the museum has the best conditions for art.
In conclusion, the best place to keep the Egyptian art should be a museum because all people can see it, all people can enjoy it, and most people can learn about the Egyptian art, the experts can study it and conduct research and then disseminate it. Also, museum is a safe place to artworks; they are protected from light, heat, earthquakes and other elements that could damage. Private collections don't have safety conditions than as a museum.
The world of ancient Egypt has been attracted the people for long time. It`s still fascination and mysterious. It tells a visual story for the oldest civilization in the world. Moreover it expresses the daily life, belief and the secret or their secrets. It could catch the imagination of the regular people and also the archaeologists.
ReplyDeleteArt and ancient artifacts in Egypt is the main destination for millions people in all over the world who wants to see and enjoy the art and artifacts. They have been built by the oldest civilization in the world. So their value is not just for the Egyptian people. It belongs to all the mankind in the world.
Egyptian Culture has been affected by the ancient in their country. For example they still present the same traditional cloths and the same painting. The art critics say the Egyptian art has not been changed at all. In addition the Egyptian people use this ancient to express their culture. Moreover they consider the ancient artifacts as their history and culture, and maybe their inspiration source to go forward.
Egyptian art and ancient artifacts are still the place where millions people want to visit to see one of the world wonders. In the other hand, those ancients are considered as main investment for the country, and good chance for jobs . Now millions of Egyptian people work for tourism companies.
Sadly, some important ancient sculptures and painting from Egypt are out of Egypt. Because they have been stolen and sold in actions for personal use that means part of the history has been vanished. Actually the value of such things is more than money. They belong to all the people. However some of the global organizations are trying to protect those ancient places and keeping them in public museums.
Finally, art and ancient artifacts are part of the history and culture for the people who live in the same country. Selling them in auction means selling the history. However that can harm all the people. The governments should take a strong action against those monopolistic people.
Egyptian art and all ancient artifacts are very valuable things nowadays. They are either have a historical meaning or beauty meaning . However there are many people looking at Egyptian art as things belong to who have the many and the power !! Preventing people from seeing them just because they don't have the many and the power is not fair . So placing Egyptian art and ancient artifacts in museum is the solution where take care and respect .
ReplyDeleteFirst of all , Egyptian art and ancient artifacts have made by people are no longer living this world , there are no one have the right to keep any piece of them for him self . They are for the public , for every person no matter he is from east or west . Because it is a witness of humanity that were here one day .
Second , placing Egyptian art and ancient artifacts in museum will Prevent them from taking the care they need and the respect they deserve . If they were auctioned the person who bought them will not necessary offer the care they need as they if they were in museum . He bought them by his money no can force him to take care for them he don't need think about them as a witnesses of humanity that our children and grandchildren would like to see them .
One more reason why should Egyptian art and ancient artifacts be placed in museum is to give chance to students and scientists to study them and know the hidden story behind them , how did they made when , when did they made and why did they they made . These things might answer some questions which can teach us more about old civilizations and the world we are living in .
In the end , I Believe placing art and ancient artifacts in museums is the best way for us and for next generations to see them any times . It's the best way to make a dead end for those who collect them for themselves and for famous .
Egyptian art & ancient artifacts shouldn’t be auctioned off for personal use in my
ReplyDeletePersonal point of view, I think it should be owned by the public because it educates
The public for example if a rich family owns an art peace then school felid trips to
The art museum can not be possible and there for are youth can’t be exposed to
their art history.
One major advantage of keeping art in museums is because of the potential revenue
they can generated. If museum advertise the art they have then people will want to
go and see it. This will create money that wouldn’t be created if it were kept in
a house.
Good works of art tend to be highly detailed. For professional artists who want to
learn from the best works will have a better opportunity to study them.
The disadvantage is that it can be stolen easier from a person’s house then a
museum. For safety reasons art should be kept in museums. It can also have a
chance of getting damaged. Some art is very old and it needs to be kept in a certain
temperature. Museums higher employees who specialize in preserving artwork.
If an artist wants to sell his work then they will have disadvantages and advantages.
One advantage is that the painter can make a name for themselves. Another
Advantage is that they will make money of their sales. If they don’t sell it then the
disadvantage is that they can’t make a name for themselves. Also they will not make
money from their artwork if they don’t sell it.
In conclusion, some artworks hold pieces of history. They reveal human thought in
Time they were created. We can learn the development of the human experience
from them. Additionally, the majority should be able to enjoy them and learn from
them. If it is kept in a house then only then minority will be able to see it in person.
Finally, it is not fair for people who cannot afford pricey art. They will not get the
chance to see them because they won’t have enough money to buy them. They
shouldn’t be kept from learning art culture and history.
I think Egyptian art and ancient artifacts should be placed in museums. The advantages are they will be safe. These Egyptian art and ancient artifacts are very valuable, if they were in museums people will know the history about them, and you can do school trips to the museums to show it to the students. Imagine theae valuable pieces are sold for personal use, I dont think too many people will know about it. He will not going to take care of them like the museums do.
ReplyDeleteFirst, Eygptian art and ancient artifacts are very valuable. They should be placed in museums to take care of it. If they sold to personal use, I think they will get damage and he will not care. These valuable arts shouldn'd be sold, they have to be in museums, because the person who bought it he will hide it in his own home. Then no one will ever know about it.
Second, if we place them in museums people will know the history of these arts. The museums will write about the arts. They will give all the informations of these arts by taking a tour in the museums, and there will be papers with the informations for personal walking. Imagine the situation if these arts are between rich guy, I dont think he will give enough informations for people. That's why it should be placed in museums.
Third, if it placed in museums you can take your school students to see them. It is a good idea if they have lessons about Egyptian arts. You can show it to the kids and write studies about it. Also, the museums will be famous and people will visit it from all over the world. The museum can do offcial trailers to show it off for audiunce.
In conclusion, it cant br sold for personal use no one will get information about them. So it should be placed in museume to let the people visit the museume to see it. Also, because its very valuable someone must take care of it. The museume will give information about the history of these arts. School can do trips for kids.
Thank you for your essays. Please remember that the assignments are due before the class...
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